Go to "For the Ladies"

Submitted by Dave B. on 10/23/01. ( )

We Men need to stick together.Beer and the Channel changer is all we have left!
I let them have it......BUT GOOD!

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hey dave

This response submitted by michael s on 10/23/01. ( )

first of all its spelled DIVORCE not devorce and why do you work at a place called V.D's
do you bring your work home with you......
wa ha ha ha hah ahahahahahahahah...lol lol loling all the way
i loved it, really loved it, good stuff if you want to argue with "she who must be obeyed" all night (unless shes blonde...duh what)

Hey now........

This response submitted by Dave . on 10/23/01. ( )

There ya go again.....se now? Just like a woman. Always correcting me!And should'nt your "i" be upper case? Now we're even(LOL).....except for the V.D. comment.I just dont want to incriminate your mama! HaHaHaHaHaHa

So you think

This response submitted by skeeter on 10/23/01. ( skeeter@xtalwind.net )

You guys just think you RULE. The women only let you think you rule.


This response submitted by Dave on 10/23/01. ( )

Oh....so you want in on this now too aye!
I'm telling you...everything originates from the man and gets its spin off to you women. Point at hand....lets see......with a man.....what rymes with skeeter?.........Hmmmmmmmmmm, thats a hard one! (No Pun intended!)


heres one

This response submitted by michael s on 10/23/01. ( )

since the beginning of man, all his troubles can be connected to a woman.
the first eviction: hey hon want a bite of this apple

history recorded the first haircut given by a woman: sampson honey your hair is to long

the downfall of a civilization: mark honey lets go for a swin in the nile, be right there cleo.

even the animal kingdom males have it rough, just look at a hen turkey, take a good look, then here comes this big boss gobbler struttin his stuff, looking good, showing off, gonna get some of that hen, yes sir....she sure is pretty...here i come babe....BANG

big boss bucks sneak thru the woods all year mostly nocturnal, hardley ever seen, then one time he gets a sniff...you know what i mean...and she smells good and hot...really ready..he has his nose to the ground not even looking up or at the cars when he crosses the road..man she's hot... she's close..grunt...grunt here i come boy does this doe want me...i am the best after all...look at my rack...grunt ..grunt hey babe you look good and smell hot too....TWANG
(decoy time..fooled by foam)

and then you have the young buck, human this time, maybe in college, hanging out at the bar at two am, really drunk and thinking he's cool..gives the pretty gal at the end of the bar a smile she cant resist...she smiles back..he goes home with a ten..at two am and wakes up with a two.. at ten am...

fooled again....and this is what we get for a rib.

oh oh wifes coming in gotta run supposed to have the dishes done.

nother one

This response submitted by michael s on 10/23/01. ( )

One day this man (patrick) was walking on the beach in California, it was late and he was thinking about God, so patrick says out loud " God, if you really are there, please speak to me"

Then all of a sudden patrick heres this loud booming voice...WHAT IS IT YOU WANT PATRICK ?
patrick, was startled he didnt really expect an answer. patrick says, well lord, i have a fear of flying and would like you to build me a bridge from california to hawaii so i can drive over to see the islands anytime i want.

the lord replies: patrick my ,that is really complicated and hard to do my schedule is way to busy at this time, perhaps there is something easier i can do for you?

patrick says: lord would you make it possible for me to understand women? i want to know what they want, what they think, why they do the things they do, i really want to understand women..
there is complete and total silence for quite a while.........

all of a sudden the lord replies:PATRICK, DID YOU WANT A TWO LANE OR A FOUR LANE BRIDGE.


This response submitted by Dave on 10/23/01. ( )

As far as that big buck was concerned.....If he's like the rest of us, if you can smell that this far away, someone has to be "Man" enough to tell her. Thats when you heard tha "Bang!" Oh, by the way, guys hate foam. It burns. If you want us to call again, try the pill!
As far a sampsom, if you remember, he got drunk and passed out before Delila cut his hair.He was hoping that the more he drank, the better she looked. Never happened. He forgot his Beer Goggles!

As far as the Tom Turkey, he realised how homely she was and fanned out to cover her face before he got shot!

As far as Mark, he seen into the future and seen how nastey Liz Taylor would look at the age of 37, so he drowned him self. Who can Blame him?

The younge "Buck" in college....even at that age it took alcahol to make her pretty.Why do women wear all that makeup? Hmmmmm...something to that. Must not look good enough being "Natural"

And why is it that the male species of all animals the most sought after for their beauty? And why is it that the hen ALWAYS goes to the Tom? Because she forgot her batteries maybe? Hmmmmm

Dont be fooled! All men love to try to read a woman's mind. Its simply because we all love "SHort Stories!" Patric now does the same!
Sleep on that one missie!


hey dave

This response submitted by michael S on 10/24/01. ( )

thats twice now, that you referrred to me as a woman.
once when i corrected you and just now in the post above, "sleep on that on missie".
if you take off the beer goggles long enough to read you will see that the name is MICHAEL (male) not MICHELE (female) and no, you're still mistyping a lot of words(we all do) HA HA HA (later)


This response submitted by Dave on 10/24/01. ( )

Sorry about that Mike,
I"ve made this same error toooo many times. By now, I should know better. My wife's father spells his the same way.No offence intended.
Sounded to me that you were on the ladies side, so I read it as Michele. Its all in fun any ways. I'de be a lost puppy without my wife!
But I did find out something very interesting though. I found out why women DONT eat M&M's........because they're just to hard to peal!

P.S. I will work on the spelling. I need to learn to proof read!



This response submitted by Mitch on 10/24/01. ( )

Blonds dont eat M&M's because it is too hard to pick out all the W&W's

not all women are dumb

This response submitted by abby on 10/25/01. ( )

not all women are dumb the way you guys are talking then all men must be stupid if all they think about is p**** and get themselves killed them OH Well Bye to all the dumb assholes ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

say all you want

This response submitted by skeeter on 10/25/01. ( skeeter@xtalwind.net )

You guys can say all you want becouse use women are tough enough to take it. Can you think of ANYTHING else that can bleed for 7 days and still live?

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