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Letter I sent to the NTA board, my address to you the readers, and John Belluchi

Discussion in 'The Taxidermy Industry' started by antlerman, Feb 26, 2013.

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  1. EA

    EA Well-Known Member

    It's hard for anyone to understand unless they have been through the system. Everyone says I'd do this or I'd do that. Until you're caught up in it, you don't know chit. When your choices are between screwed and totally @$% you'll choose screwed every time. You catch a gutless lawyer and a prosecutor up for re-election and see what your options are. I once had a lawyer who pissed off and insulted everyone involved. Guess who payed - me

    Tim, I feel for you. Glad you made it out.
     


  2. That's a great response!!! Takes a man to say that.
     

  3. michael p.

    michael p. Getting better with age :)

    Very well said John Belluci.
     
  4. antlerman

    antlerman NTA Life Member #0118

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    I tried to send JOhn a Thank You in a pm, but he has me blocked, so I will say it here.


    Thanks JOhn
     
  5. I have questioned some of Tim's intentions toward the NTA. I personally thought he just wanted a witch hunt. I had no problem with his past, as a Christian, our religion is based on forgiveness. Hold your head high Tim, I think the NTA should be seeking you out to join. And no matter what's in the past, JB made one hell of an apology. In the end, it's all little chit.


    Posted using Outdoor Hub Campfire
     
  6. antlerman

    antlerman NTA Life Member #0118

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    THAT was awfully nice of you to say. Thank You
     
  7. GWebb

    GWebb Well-Known Member

    Tim, I'm glad things worked out for you the way they did and you have been able to put it behind you.

    I have spent almost 20 years working in the Prison System and realized years ago all it takes is someone to get pissed off and make accusations of this nature, getting a child to do it makes it worse. If you don't have the money to fight it you can be up the creek. It usually turns into a he said vs. she said issue and there usually does not have to be any physical evidence. Any one can be forever changed by these types of accusations even if they are innocent. As Tim stated, you spend 3 or 4 months, or maybe a little longer, try 7 or 8 months in jail awaiting a hearing. If you don't have bail money that is where you will be, wondering why your friends and family won't bail you out...and then your faced with lets say 20 counts of sexual abuse by a parent/custodian/gaurdian, at 15-30 years per charge that would amount to 300 to 600 years if run consecutively...but they say if you will pled guilty to 1 count you can be out in 15 years. OK, now who do you want to take your chances with?? A jury than can find you guilty and sentence you to up to 600 years??

    On another note people can say all they want, I have heard it said 1000 times from grown men that if someone does something to my kid I will kill them, said it myself a few times. Then I got custody of my daughter when she was 14 years old, we had suspected something was up with her stepdad, him having her wear a wedding ring and several other things, then one day I found a letter she had written...it literally brought me to my knees. I had two choices, do what everyone says they will do or be there and support my daughter through this, I chose supporting her. He admitted to over 100 violations. Unfortunately the Justice System didn't work in my/our favor. Sadley it sounds like you, as an innocent person spent more time in than someone who admitted to doing it.

    Keep your chin up Tim, don't let anyone bring you down!!
     
  8. antlerman

    antlerman NTA Life Member #0118

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    Thanks GWebb I am so sorry to hear about your daughter. Best advice I can give you is just keep on loving her. It's sad, but often times the victim is made to feel like it was all her fault. Which we know is BS, but try telling that to them until they get older and figure it out. It's a hard place for them to be. Get her into therapy. She may think she's fine, but reality say's she's not.

    My current wife of 10 years was a victim. She claims she doesn't allow herself to remain the victim, which is good, but the scares of her abuse still show. She is the younger of two girls. All of her life she has been referred to as the "pretty one". A badge she doesn't wear very well. When she was 4, her grandfather promised her the moon if he could just put his mouth on her. Of course she didn't know or understand what the deal was, but he had promised her a pony, a bike and other things. To this day she almost loathes at the idea when someone says "she's pretty". She feels that being pretty was what caused her grandfather to molester her, and not her sister. She still has many issues, that I see, but she doesn't always understand. I just have to love her thru it all the best I can. She is very protective of her older sister. It's as though she feels guilty of getting the better genes and hates it.

    Similar story with the wife who made the allegations. She was the youngest of 3. A older brother and an older sister. She could never understand why her brother was molesting her, but not her sister Jamie. In this case, Jamie was refereed to as the pretty one by their mother. Jamie was killed in a car wreck, and when that happened as sad as it may sound, my ex felt as though NOW she could be the pretty one. Brad was the oldest and mama's favorite and when my ex tried to get validation from her mother about what Brad had done to her, her mother rejected the notion. She wanted validated and never got it. I know in my heart that this played into her making those claims against me. Her anger was transferred onto someone close to her. Me. In her mind, I was her brother so to speak. That's deep, but that's the way victims react a lot of the time. They don't know what to do with their anger and rage and often times it gets directed at someone who loves them. Note that we were only together for 3 years, so it's very likely that a lot of transference was going on there.

    Abuse leaves scars. If you have an abused person in your family, just love them. Even when they are the most unlovable. Chances are something else is going on inside them that they don't know how to channel. It's not you. It's the scars from their past. I know a woman who in her 40's can't enjoy sex. Abused as a child, to this day, sex is a dirty thing to her. I know another woman who has lived the most promiscuous life you could ever imagine. While as a 9 year old girl until she was 19, her two older brothers has sex with her on a nightly basis. When asked about her lifestyle and choices, her response was, I learned at an early age that that was how to get guys to like me. It wasn't until she became a mother that her views changed. Now she's the most protective person you could ever meet.

    As much as I have been with the abusers, I've been around the abused just as much. Just love them. They can't help it when they are not so lovable. You have to be the understanding one. The one thing that I have such a problem with is our education of people. Why doesn't our family units teach the effects of abuse to our kids, to parents and to our entire human race? It always seems that we are talking about abusers and the abused after the fact verses before the fact. Therapy is good, but education would be better.





    John, not so much courage. More anger and frustration than anything. I had to respond to the NTA about the E-mail from John and Bill, so while I was doing it, it only made sense to include everything to reduce the amount of questions and speculation as I could. So, while doing it for them, why not do it for everyone. Please don't call it courage because there was really nothing to be scared of unless people wouldn't except the truth and I know most people believe the truth will set you free, and I feel freer today. I guess I had no idea where people stood. But I've come to find that their were many on the fence about me. I didn't know. So now, I feel better in that alone. It's all good to get it all out there for everyone I think. People will still judge. But at least they have something TO judge now, and not just a one sided bad report with little facts attached.
     
  9. BDrake

    BDrake Active Member

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    What letter did you read??
    Let me summerize the documents provided.
    #1 Is a required letter from DCFS stating Tim had passed the required programs and was in there opinion at low risk of harming a small boy.
    #2 Is a document from DCFS stating there were no findings of child abuse against Tim (This has nothing to do with the rape conviction)
    #3 Is a document stating Tim had completed the required sex offender treatment program while on parole.
    #4 Is a document stating that he no longer is required to register as a sex offender. The laws have changed since then, had he been convicted after the new laws were enacted he would be regeristing for life.
    There is NOTHING in the documents pertaining to the charge and conviction that say(false accusations,record expunged)
    Iam not saying I think he is quilty or innocent, there is not enough information to make a logical decision.
    JUST KEEP IT REAL,and stop making things up.
    If you believe him, then he is innocent, if you think it is a lie then you do not beleivehim.
    I would say it will be a 50/50 split
     
  10. George

    George The older I get, the better I was.

    BDrake why don't you crawl back in your hole and shut the hell up. You're one of those sanctimonious SOB's who admires his own ability to pass judgement on someone regardless of the facts put in front if you. In this case you're worse than Bellucci.
     
  11. Bill Yox

    Bill Yox Well-Known Member

    Ok we are DONE with the trial. If any of you still cannot comprehend what all has been written here, youll have to accept it as-is and move on accordingly. The topic at hand was the accusation and the accuser, and that has been handled. The current topic will remain to be righting the NTA, with a hopeful positive outcome. No more questions about legitamacy of Tims past, his explanation, or paperwork. If that is not ok with ANY of you, either contact Ken for that same explanation, or find somewhere else to debate. Wellwishers may want to PM Tim instead, although Id love for our members to see the outpouring of support for him, too.
     
  12. Harry Whitehead

    Harry Whitehead I love to hunt Buffalos!!!!!

    Good call Bill.....
     
  13. critterstuffr

    critterstuffr New Member

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    I wish just once all the big mouths on here would all stand in the same room with the people they talk down to and get close enough to smell what they had for lunch. Then open your flapper and say what you have to say face to face, my bet is you could hear a pin drop till the pee ran down their legs and they walked away. You owe nobody any thing more Tim. JMO
     
  14. catman

    catman Active Member

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    I have not followed a whole lot of this, but I did read the beginning and the part on the third page about John wishing to make ammends. I did not read more than that, I don't need to. It does me no good to wtness all these hard feelings. Tim, I know that there is some broken glass, I also know that John wishes to pay for it. If you let him, you will have done a great thing. If you don't, well you have just done what most people do, hold onto bitterness. I am not trying to make this a simple thing. Matters of the heart are never simple, but something really epic could be happening here. Let it happen. Once you realize that forgiveness is the most powerfull gift you posess, your life becomes richer. Like I said, a lot has gone on here that I have not read and I may have missed something that may involve others, but Iv'e seen a touch of humility and the shot at reconciliation hinted at. Let it build!
     
  15. antlerman

    antlerman NTA Life Member #0118

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    I'll be honest and say that it's truly hard to believe or except, But I am trying and I can feel the bitterness melting away. That's a good thing. I've always held the belief that men should be able to knock the crap out of each other, then go have a beer together and put it all behind them. I drink Michelob Ultra.
     
  16. shammy

    shammy New Member

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    Tim, we personally have never met. But I will say this. You Sir are one of the most standup and honest person I have come across. I stand behind you 100%. It takes a great deal of Love and Forgiveness to do and come forward with what you have posted on here. As for you John B. I never returned a email back to you because I wasnt sure if I wanted to now what personal information you were going to send me. I am sure everyone has things in their life happen that they would like to erase. Including you and myself. Now it has be brought to light I think what you were talking about. Not by you, But the Man himself. John I also am aware that their are people who like to just stir the pot. I thank you for the apology that you sent Tim. See there is hope for us all. And it is given to us thru the Lord; JESUS CHRIST. In Love, Forgiveness and Integrity. That is why there is Hope for the NTA, but back in the hands of the membership and the board, not the Crain's. Tim, John and everyone else lets press on with it and get the NTA back. shammy
     
  17. BDrake

    BDrake Active Member

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    I`ll have a good dark German beer!
     
  18. I have been a law enforcement officer for 26 years. Believe it or not, this happens all the time, where one is wrongly accused. Normally when the truth is finally discovered, the wrongly accused is no longer with us, as the pressure and humility takes a toll. It's a damn shame but it does happen quite often. My hat is off to you for sticking it out antler man, and not taking the other route.
     
  19. antlerman

    antlerman NTA Life Member #0118

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    Thank You lmooney for weighing in. I'll share a bit more. The then sheriff came to my holding cell when first arrested and asked me what was going on? I told him. He said, Tim there is nothing I can do. I wish there was because I believe you. I was treated differently than all the rest of those in jail. I was catered to. There may have been nothing he could do at the time, but once I did come home the entire sheriff's department reached out to me and welcomed me home. Today they are all my customers. That fact alone lets me know they knew I was being railroaded all along. There were many dark days. I won't try to say there wasn't. But my family and those who supported me made it all doable, and when I came home the whole community welcomed me back home. Not the usual that one would expect for someone with a charge such as mine. On the day that they cut my ankle bracelet off, after 3 years, the town held a party in my honor. I was overwhelmed. Even my parole officer stopped by and had a piece of cake with us. He too was happy to celebrate my freedom. This has caused me to develop a belief that ALL things happen for a reason. My life, my experiences, and the knowledge obtained along the way, have served to teach me that life sometimes isn't fair, but still very rewarding and worth the experience. I've been asked many times if I was bitter. I really don't feel that. I am grateful to be alive, home, and well, as well as thankful for my many friends. Life is good.
     
  20. finazducks

    finazducks EJ is not the only one to have two Wasco Awards

    I'm glad John apologized, but this could be a lesson for those that dive in and assasinate someones character without the whole story. What about Johns letter to the NTA? Will you retract it John? It's only fair. And Phill I forgive you for anything you may or may not have done lol And, I apologize for talking about an NTA board members buggy eyes.
     
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